Why is it that I can't keep things put away? It seems that no matter how many times I clean house, fold clothes, pick up stuff, dust furniture, or wash the dishes, there is always something to be done. You know that feeling when you finally get the dishwasher turned on only to straighten up and see one more glass on the counter? Argh, the frustration of it all! I try. I try to keep things done. Tonight we are going to work on putting the boxes from the Christmas decorations back in the attic. I will pick up dirty clothes and take them to the hamper, unload the dishes, and give the dog a bath. Then I will start all over tomorrow.
Sometimes I wonder why bother? Do I really need to make the bed when I am going to be sleeping in it again tonight anyway? YES!!! You see, I can't stand the wrinkled sheets. They bunch up and peel off the corners during the night. My husband pulls the blankets one way and I pull the sheet the other way. By morning it's a jumbled mess. When I lie down tonight I want everything to be smooth and comfortable, welcoming me to a restful night of sleep.
I think of that bed and it reminds me that there is sin in my life that needs to be confessed. The Lord is waiting to smooth out the wrinkles and jumbled mess I make of my life each day. Sin. It creeps into my thoughts and actions. I twist and turn and wrinkle things up. The problem I have is that I don't always take the time to get this mess straighted out before tucking myself in at night. Unconfessed sin continues to jumble up my life.
Why not confess? Why not fall on my face before God and cry out for mercy? Why continue to carry on this way? Oh, wow. Those words that kept coming up over and over this summer are here again now. Pride. Apathy. Either I think too highly of myself and don't see my need to be forgiven, or I just don't care. Honestly, it's a little of both.
I hate to admit I am wrong. I hate to admit that I said hateful words, reacted in anger, delayed or avoided reaching out to that one person who needed me most today. I hate to admit that I sinned. That doesn't make it not true, though. Actually, I must say those words Paul said long ago - surely I am the chief of all sinners.
I also must admit that far too often I just don't care. Not only do I not care, I don't even know I don't care. I move through the minutes of my day unaware of broken hearts or lonely people. There is so much on my calendar that I don't make time to look around and see who it is that needs a word of encouragement or a shoulder to cry on. Who am I avoiding that needs to know someone cares?
Isaiah says: "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord, "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." Hallelujah! Phillip Yancey says about this passage: God is actually describing his eagerness to forgive. The same God who created the heavens and the earth has the power to bridge the great chasm that separates him from his creatures. He will reconcile, he will forgive, no matter what obstacles his prodigal children put in the way.
I stumble over many obstacles all day long. Praise the Lord that He is eager to forgive! When I seek His forgiveness, my twisted, wrinkled, and jumbled mess is neat, smooth, and clean because I surrender to His will. First John says that God is faithful to forgive my sin when I confess it to Him. Just like making the bed each morning, I daily make time to come before Him to seek His face and forgiveness. In doing so, I am able to step into the day and serve the One who graciously allows me to live transformed.
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